Wednesday, March 08, 2006


Just had level 5 with my eccentric priest friend. He bimbled into my office with his broken memories shared and told me the story of when William Temple was asked by a 'God fearing' evangelical if he was saved. 'Dear sir' he gently replied, 'I am saved, but not safe.'

I liked that and decided that there was a streak of the Jesuit in my warm friend...


Mata H said...

In your blog you several times mention having "level 5" with someone -- please, what is "level 5"?


The Harbour of Ourselves said...

it's something my friend Pip Wilson nurtures and longs for from people...this is his description of what it is...

...If we unwrap – feel a bit naked,
we grow
If we stay unwrapped,
un - revealed to others
we do not share our uniqueness,
we take no risks.

In a couple of my books I talk about
'Level 5 communication'
and I want to walk you through the levels ::
Level 1
Cliché ::
is when we communicate in cliché –
“lovely weather we are having” -
so natural to say to strangers
so boring with intimate friends
those we wish to relate too better.

Level 2
Facts ::
This level is when we
communicate facts only.
Retelling what we have done,
What we saw on TV,
viewed at the football match.
Interesting, maybe, but only for a little while.

Level 3
Opinions ::
This level we start to unwrap a little –
it is when we give opinions
we give something of ourselves away
(maybe about the TV programme or football).
Watch out here – others could disagree.

Level 4
Feelings ::
This is the big start of real communication – unwrapping.
Level 4 is all about feelings.
When we are honest to another about our
feelings which are active - here and now - right there in our interior self.
How we are feeling within – emotional stuff.
When, are are willing to take that step, we reveal/unwrap these –
we are taking risks
but wonderfully so.
People begin to understand our human beautifulness.
We become more alive to them.
The relationship becomes alive.

Level 5
Total Openness ::
This is the target.
Maybe never achieved.
It is total openness,
honesty –
fully unwrapped.
This, I believe,
is beautiful.
This is how all people best open up,
grow, develop, change.
And I believe that the better we become at this –
the warmer,
the more beautiful
we can become - in our 'becoming'.

We can ‘Level 5’ with our partners.
With our friends.
Work mates.
God too!

It all begins with taking the risk
taking off wrappings
share the gift we are
with others
not waiting for others.

or we can stay
a gift unwrapped
a beautiful human
a beautiful human